Each person is a person, and must accept his strengths and weaknesses equally. If you cannot succeed at work, your personal life does not add up and it seems that everything is going according to plan - do not despair. Just review your daily affairs and attitudes and try to change them.
You can read about ways to increase self-esteem in books, hear in trainings and on TV. But before you use good advice, you need to understand the causes of self-doubt.
Reasons for low self-esteem
Low self-esteem is formed from early childhood. Due to the fact that the child cannot correctly evaluate himself in any action, he needs an opinion from close people (parents, brothers, sisters, grandmothers).
Reasons for low self-esteem of the child:
- Lack of time. Parents are busy with their own affairs: work, home cooking, cleaning, and other everyday fuss. There is no one to speak with the child; his spiritual needs are ignored. The opinion of an adult is not taken into account in the family. For example, without his will they are taken to grandparents for the whole summer;
- Lack of emotionality in the family. The child does not feel ordinary heat. They do not hug him, do not praise him, do not share feelings and emotions with him;
- Comparison The child is compared with other children;
- An ideal that is hard to achieve. As a rule, an adult is put as an example. Mom has 4 educations, and grandfather is a famous scientist. You should not fail either;
- Physical impairment or illness.If the child does not look like peers, then ridicule begins at school. There are families that also laugh at the shortcomings of the kids;
- Scandals, divorce of parents and alcoholism in the family are also reasons for the formation of low self-esteem. If parents often swear, one of them drinks, they get divorced, the children take it on their own account, thinking that the reason lies in them.
One of the above reasons for low self-esteem is present in almost every person. But there is a concept of high self-esteem. Such people are arrogant, aggressive and show off achievements. It is difficult for them to adequately assess behavior and achieve the desired success. People with low self-esteem have much to strive for and reach new heights.
You can cope with low self-esteem. In order for the methods to be effective, the problem needs to be understood and recognized in the causes of its occurrence. It’s worth starting with the forgiveness of everyone who has ever offended you. They forgot about it for a long time, and a person may form a feeling of anger, anger and revenge that destroy from the inside.
Effective ways to increase self-esteem
The most effective way to increase self-esteem is to find an approach to yourself. Psychologists also recommend a comprehensive study of the personal fears that are present in a person. You can do this exercise on your own or involve a specialist psychologist.
Several effective ways to increase self-esteem:
- Keep track of what you’ve done daily. Write everything that worries at the moment: deeds, thoughts, reasoning and plans for the future. Thanks to the small written text, a person can correctly evaluate himself at a particular moment in time, analyze achievements, successes, mistakes and failures;
- Stop blaming yourself. Thus, a person creates an illusion and a dome of failures, in which he is located because of thoughts. If you want to work out personal psychological problems, try to be neutral with this, without any extra emotions. Only in this case will you be able to correctly evaluate yourself and increase your self-esteem;
- Monitor your psychological and emotional state. Think about each step ahead. Learn to share emotions and be enthusiastic about business. When using this advice, personal affairs will be conscious and real, and problems easily solved;
- Think about comfort. It is about healthy egoism. Most people with low self-esteem claim that the people around them are to blame for their problems. This is actually not the case. The man himself is to blame for the consequences of the problem. He has been trying to please and please everyone for a long time, but in the end it does not lead to anything and he is upset. If you want to be respected, translate your needs, desires and interests into reality, not expecting a reaction from others;
- Live today and think about what happens to you at a particular time interval. Thus, a person will be able to maintain a balance between the past, present and future;
- Think positively, concentrate on the final result of the plan and then everything will work out, and self-esteem will increase;
- Change and new ideas. Change yourself and feel how the opinion of you around is changing. The most effective tools for raising your own self-esteem are openness and honesty.
Self-confidence is not only one's own dignity, but also the acceptance of one’s own shortcomings as they are.
Everything is impossible to control. A person should not try to do everything on his own. He must listen to his inner voice and treats himself with understanding.
Daily self-esteem tips
If a person wants to increase self-esteem, then first of all he must pay attention to what he does every day. Secondly, he must realize his ideas and set real goals.
There are some simple daily tips to help a person increase their self-esteem:
- Always look neat. Engage in appearance, sports, change your image. Girls can experiment with new shadows, lipstick.
- Read the biography of great and successful people daily. Reading motivational literature gives impetus to development.
- Set small achievable goals. If the goal is large and significant for a person, the fear of failure can seriously demotivate. Completing the goal in parts is much easier, including at the psychological level.
- Do good deeds. For example, if you do something good for another person, you will be filled with inner strength. Also, in the eyes of other people you will seem a strong personality, which will lead to an automatic increase in self-esteem.
- Do not communicate with those people who see only negative moments in life. Start communicating with positive personalities. A person involuntarily gives in to the influence of the environment and it is better if they are positive-minded and confident people.
Daily advice does not require much effort and heroic deeds from a person. However, their effectiveness has been proven not only by psychologists, but also by successful, motivated people.
How to increase self-esteem after parting?
Why does self-esteem decline after parting? The fact is that a return to the starting point of one’s life means uncertainty and instability. After all, a person planned a future together with his beloved, but everything suddenly collapsed. For this reason, a person becomes insecure and disappointed and it is difficult to understand what is happening around.
You need to look at the separation from a positive point of view. For example, it can become an impetus for career advancement. Raising from a material point of view will allow you to realize your plans and dreams.
Some effective tips to help regain confidence in yourself and increase self-esteem after parting:
- Restore your confidence. To do this, repeat the phrase: "I am happy and joyful, the most beautiful, extraordinary." Close your eyes and repeat these words several times. It really works.
- Go in for sports. He transforms a person physically and spiritually. For example, a daily run allows you to clear your mind of negative thoughts, and rid your body of toxins.
- Do not be lazy. We all perfectly understand how easy it is to stay in bed and expect insight. If a person really wants to be happy, he must act. Follow your plan regardless of the weather: cold, heat or moon phases. These are just convenient excuses and reasons.
- Shown easy flirt with others. Thanks to this, a person will learn to communicate with people around him and get the desired result.
The main rule after parting is to let go of the past and take care of yourself. If you distract from self-pity and embark on interesting things (sports, career, self-realization), the second half will appear unnoticed and you will be happy.
Self-Exercise Exercises
Each person in his own way is interesting and fascinating. Several specially designed effective exercises will help you to gain confidence:
- Forgive yourself for minor failures.If conscience torments you for some actions or it seems that the decision was made incorrectly, then first of all you need to calm down. Then take a deep breath and think about everything that haunts you. Exhale, inhale again and for exhale, forgive yourself, think about whether you can change something.
- Learn to love yourself the way you are.Exercise helps get rid of unreasonable complexes, cope with self-eating and make life brighter and richer. You should say the following words to yourself: “I am a unique person. I should not be like anyone else, I am me! ” Write a list of your achievements and positive qualities. Get an album for pleasant memories and a box with little things. Set yourself up for positive and love yourself!
- Do the work on the bugs. Man is not perfect and makes mistakes. There is no need to spread rot and self-destruction if a defeat has occurred in life. For example, if you are not hired. Not scary. Analyze your behavior and knowledge, learn a lesson. At the next interview, everything will work out for sure. Our thoughts are material, so everything happens according to the scenario that we are setting ourselves up for.
- Set realistic goals.Take a piece of paper and divide it into two parts. On one side, write down a specific task, and on the other side, an achievable one. The latter may include the option of asking for promotion from the authorities. If you plan to do this, then do not delay.
- Do not compare yourself with others. Thoughts such as: “But Nastya’s husband bought a fur coat, but I don’t. Why am I worse? ”Should not even visit the head. Everyone has their own life and there is no need to try to keep up with someone, trying to show their superiority. Make your life better on your own. Repeat the main words: "I can do everything, I can manage everything, as soon as I want it."
Simple exercises will help make life brighter and richer, because if a person is confident in his personality and endeavors, then even the daily routine takes on other shades.
Psychologist tips to enhance
When a person cannot cope with complexes and shortcomings on his own, he can turn to the professional help of psychologists. Their main tips are as follows:
- Do not follow the life of others, their achievements and successes. Live your life here and now.
- Do not take to heart the reaction of strangers to your words and actions.
- Your values should come first, do not let others manipulate your personality.
- Accept yourself and others as you are, and see how life will change for the better.
- Separate your personality and actions. If something doesn’t work out, it doesn’t mean that you are a failure, this is an occasion to try again.
Low self-esteem is not a sentence. With a little effort and desire, you can become a successful and happy person. Listen to yourself and your needs!